


Supertinywords's Jayroy Week 2019

by Onlymostydead



Category: DCU, DCU (Comics)
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Bipolar Roy Harper, Blood, Canon Typical Violence, Confessions of love, Flirting, Foster Care, Hanahaki Disease, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sci Fi AU, Sex Robot Mention. They aren't used but they're there., Suicidal Thoughts, drug mention, friendly bantering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-17
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:15:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21832024
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Onlymostydead/pseuds/Onlymostydead
Summary: (I know this is really late)A collection of oneshots written for Jayroy week, 2019!
Relationships: Roy Harper/Jason Todd
Comments: 3
Kudos: 78





	1. Sci Fi AU

**Author's Note:**

> Tags vary per chapter, if there are any big warnings, I'll have a warning.

"You've gotta be the worst smuggler I've ever met."

Jason had no idea how he'd gotten here. In a nasty, low down kind of bar surrounded by smooth robots made for dirty deeds and the kind of people who rented them? That was normal. Drinking a kind of space whiskey that made his throat feel like it was about to catch fire? Completely within the ordinary. Feeling the satisfaction of a job well done, the heaviness of a metal money card in his breast pocket? That was what he always did.

But talking to the guy he was hired to deliver to this scummy planet, leaning in so close that he could smell the sickly sweet blue fruity drink he was sipping on? Jason didn't know what he was thinking.

Well... He knew what he was thinking.

"I mean, how many smugglers do you know?" Jason chuckled, taking a sip of his drink.

Roy rolled his eyes. "Enough."

He was thinking that this guy, his cargo, was just about the hottest guy in the galaxy. Messy red hair swept back in a low ponytail, shorter pieces falling loose and framing his face. Freckles splattered across his face like stars, the way that he licked his lips, that perfect Cupid's bow... He was dressed up in just about the most conspicuous way possible, like the ward of a rich businessman with a lot of enemies. Which he was. 

Not. Subtle. At all.

But Jason wasn't about to complain about the rich red fabric, about the way the neckline of his silky shirt showed off so much of his collarbone, the intricate vest that cinched in right at the smallest place on his waist. The belt with a light blaster strapped on it in a failed attempt to convince Jason he wasn't totally useless.

It wasn't doing much, though. Not to convince him that he wouldn't be completely dead weight in a fight. This pretty boy, with half a dozen piercings in each ear, soft hands and a taste for sweet things and party pleasures would get torn up if a fight broke out.

He raised an eyebrow. "So you've known just enough smugglers to know that I'm the worst?"

"Yeah." Roy smirked, sipping at his drink. "You really are the worst."

"And why's that?"  
"I mean," He shrugged. "I haven't even seen your face yet. You've just been wearing that awful helmet..."

"The helmet's to keep me from dying when I get shot in the head with a light blaster, genius." Jason pointed out. "And is my face that important to you?"

"It might be."

"You're such a spoiled brat, pretty boy."

Roy stiffened, eyes narrowing. "That's not true."

"Is it? How long are you going to survive in this dump?" Jason looked him up and down, from his shiny boots to the faint shimmer on his eyelids. "You're too pretty for a place like this."

"So you really do think I'm pretty? Not just teasing me?" He batted his eyelashes. "Nice try, but I'm not that easy, you scoundrel."  
"So I'm a scoundrel now?" 

"Obviously. I mean, what are you trying to do here?"

What was he trying to do here? That was a good question, and one he didn't know how to answer. Jason frowned, brows furrowing, spinning his glass slowly in his hands when...

He opened his mouth, but before he could speak, a bolt from a light blaster hit his helmet square on, knocking him back into the bar.

"Jason!?" He could hear Roy yell, just a little foggy, the noise and the knock back of the blast rendering him motionless for a moment.

Then all hell broke loose.

The sound of blaster a being fired overwhelmed the music of the little dive bar, animatronic, human, and alien screams all melding together into one. Jason pulled himself up to his feet, pulling off part of his cracked helmet so he could see. The sensors weren't working, shit. But now he could see that-

There was Roy Harper, standing there, blaster out, firing away like a pro. Better than half the smugglers and bounty hunters Jason was used to working with. His red silk sleeves caught the blue and orange and pink lights in that odd way, giving him a kind of glow. Blood dripped from his nose onto that perfect Cupid's bow of his lips, the ends curled into a wide smile.

Jason could only take him into for a moment, though, before he pulled the blasters out of his thigh holsters and joined the fray.

"Somebody after you?" Roy yelled over the noise, casting his head in Jason direction for only a moment.

"Always!"

"You are really the worst-"

"Yeah, yeah!" He rolled his eyes. "Let's just focus on getting out of here!"

And that they did. It didn't take long, the two of them blasting anyone who got in their way, running out to where Jason's shitty little ship of the moment was packed, climbing onboard and revving her up. In a matter of minutes they were out, course plotted for somewhere else, headed out into space.

And everything felt like it came crashing down.

"So now what?" Roy sat down on the floor, leaning up against the wall of the ship. "Thought I'd be safe there, but I'm guessing shooting all of those people kinda means I'm not?"

"Nope. Definately wanted on that planet. Probably not the system, though; that place is pretty scummy." Jason explained, finishing tinkering with some wire. "Guess I should probably take this helmet off, huh?"  
"Probably." Roy traced the seams in the floor. "I guess I just don't know where I go from here."

"I mean, I've never seen anyone shoot like that... Unless they're really trained."

He looked up, those glassy green eyes wide for a moment, then falling back to their normal cocky position. "Of course. I've been shooting ever since I was a kid. Grew up on Gravis III."  
"Really?" Jason blinked. "A pretty boy like you?"

"I wasn't always his ward. I came from somewhere, you know."

Roy crossed his arms, and Jason could tell that part of the conversation was over. If he didn't want to talk about his past, that was fine. In fact, well... That hit a little too close to home. Growing up on a piss poor planet, getting taken in by a rich man with problems that end up consuming your life, running away to escape it all...

"Yeah, I get it." He nodded. "But, like I said, you shoot well. If you can do anything else that well, it might be worth it to let you stick around."

Roy raised an eyebrow. "Really?"

"Only as long as you want to." Jason paused. "If you want to."

"I mean..."

"Besides, you're pretty. Can't hurt to have someone looking like you around the ship."

Roy scoffed, rolling his eyes. "No, but seriously... I would like that, I think. On one condition."

Jason shrugged. "What's that?"  
"Take off your helmet."

"Really?" He rolled his eyes, pulling off the remainder of the cracked, broken, charred up helmet. "You happy now?"

"Yeah, pretty much." Roy grinned. "And I can say one thing is for sure."  
"And what's that?"

"You are by far the hottest smuggler I've ever met."


	2. Soulmates/No Capes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Mr. Wayne, Roy's next door neighbor, takes in another foster kid his age, he has no idea what to expect. A friend, maybe? 
> 
> Turns out, it's a whole lot more complicated.

When Jason Todd moved in next door, Roy wasn't prepared for what would happen next. Hell, he didn't even know who this guy was. He knew that he would be a boy, that he would be a year or so younger than him, that he knew that he was their neighbor, Mr. Wayne's, new foster kid. Dick's younger brother. Sort of. But not really.

He knew that Dick said that wasn't how that worked and that Jason was just... Jason right now. And that he was pissed off at Bruce for taking him in. But that probably wouldn't make a difference, anyway, because he knew that Ollie said he would probably be gone within the week, and that he shouldn't count on him sticking around. That he shouldn't go and get attached to him. He had a habit of doing that, and this kid was a bad one to do that to: a Gotham city street kid with a history of running away. 

According to Mr. Wayne, at least. This was all gossip.

But Dick agreed with him. 

It wasn't a decision to befriend him, though. Really, it wasn't. He saw him sitting out on the sidewalk outside his house, looking so small and alone, and...

Roy just couldn't help it. Runaway or no. Dick pissed off at his existence or no. 

"Hey, can I sit here?"

The kid, Jason, slouched down in a red hoodie and a worn out pair of black jeans with holes in the knees, shrugged. "It's the fuckin' sidewalk. Public property. I can't stop you if you want to sit down."

"Yeah, yeah, sure. But that's not what I meant, and you know it, smartass. I'm Roy. Roy Harper."

He looked him up and down with those watery blue green eyes. Aqua? Aquamarine? What was that color called? "Jason. Jason Todd. Probably already knew that though, didn't you? Everybody's been talkin', lately. And I've seen you around."

"Yeah... Mr. Wayne's always pulling some weird shit, hard not to talk about it." Roy shrugged, shoving his hands in his pockets; Zillow did the same thing. "So at least it's not really your fault? Still, I know the feeling. Before you, I guess I was 'that kid' in the neighborhood."  
Jason raised an eyebrow, as if to raise a question, then decided against it and shrugged again. "Wouldn't really make a difference, would it, now? People's always talk, you've just gotta get used to it. What my dad always used to say, anyways. Mind if I smoke?"

"Not really." He paused as Jason pulled out a lighter. "So, what do you like to do? What kind of shit are you into?"

"...why?"

"Because you're my neighbor now? And besides, we're pretty much the same age. We'll be going to the same school here in a couple of weeks. Might as well get to know you."

Jason gave him a wary look, lighting his cigarette. "Sure. Whatever. Tell me about yourself, first. Have to make sure you're not a weirdo."

***

That was back when they were thirteen and fourteen. Back then, he didn't see himself falling for that disheveled little kid sitting on the sidewalk. That was out of the question. Messy black hair with those streaks of white at the front, blue green eyes - aquamarine just sounded pretentious - and clothes that were so baggy they hung off his clothes hanger frame, but...

Now? Now, things had gotten bad.

Because, miraculously, against all odds, he didn't run away before school started in September. He stayed until the first day, and he was alone by the time lunch rolled around, so...

Roy invited him to come sit with his friends. He didn't quite fit with them, and it was weird since Dick was there, and the tension between them was awkward to start, but...

Things broke down between them, a little. It was nice.

And his laugh was adorable. It made Roy feel like the sun was shining down directly on him, like everything was perfect in the world, like he hadn't been in the middle of a depressive episode for the past six weeks. 

That should have been his first sign, where he noticed that he really had it bad for this boy. But of course he didn't realize yet...

Not when it was weeks later and he was sitting really close next to Jason, just because, well... It was friendly? He didn't really have a reason, other than hoping their shoulders would brush together. Which wasn't suspicious at all, because they were just friends. Yeah. Friends.

Not when it was weeks after that, learning everything he could about him just by talking to him and listening; his favorite color was green, where exactly he grew up in Crime Alley, his favorite foods, what kinds of things he liked when other people did. And he tried to do those things, too. He wore the color green even though it looked bad clashing with his red hair, and he made chili dogs, "just because they sounded really damn good."

And Roy really should have noticed that it was a crush. He should have, by that point.

Because being with Jason made his lungs ache, it made him feel like he couldn't breathe-

And that's when, at the end of ninth grade, the first petal came out of his mouth. It was only one, but he knew right away what that meant.

This crush - and that's what this was - would actually kill him, this time. It wouldn't just feel that way, like his others always did. It wouldn't just end in him going through an emotional roller coaster of depressive and manic cycles. It would kill him before he got the chance to do something drastic like going off his meds.

Because there was no way Jason felt the same way back.

There was no way Jason looked at him and felt the sun shining. And wanted to be close. 

This crush would kill him. It was just a matter of time.  
***

By the end of the summer, though, things were still going fine. Roy was hiding the little yellow flower petals well, keeping the coughing to a bare minimum. He really didn't cough often anyway; only really coming up with petals around once a week or so.

But that didn't mean it wouldn't get worse. That was how this disease worked, after all. There was no cure; there was only the surgery that ripped the flowers out of your lungs, destroying all of your memories together. 

So things would get worse. Progressively. And that was just how things were going to be.  
Especially when...

"You know, Roy?" 

He and Jason were lying up on towels on the roof, baking in the hot August sun. The towels kept the roof from burning them - his idea - but the roof have them privacy that the lawn didn't afford - Jason's. 

"Yeah?"

"You know why I stayed, right?"

Kids were playing down the street, and a car might've driven past on a nearby road, but other than that, there was dead silence. 

Roy frowned, looking over at him. "Why's that?" 

He looked so beautiful like this, sweat plastering his dumb, two-toned hair to his forehead, skin glistening acne and all, eyes just resting shut...

"I mean, part of it was because of Dick and Bruce, not gonna lie. Those two mean a lot to me too, but..." Jason swallowed. "I stayed a lot 'cause you talked to me. I don't know. You didn't talk down or anything. No bullshit, no convincing me not to leave."

Another car drove past.

"Well, I..." A lump had formed in his throat; it wasn't a petal, but damn was it making it hard to speak. "I'm glad you stayed."  
"Me too, Roy. Me too."

***

In the middle of Roy's sophomore year, he started to pay more attention to the petals. They were still infrequent, but that aching, choking feeling in his lungs...

That never quite went away.

Which was to say: he got to hang out with Jason more.

It was easier because they were both in high school, now. People had thought it was weird last year, but let it slide because Jason was such a weird kid already. Because he was new. Because some people thought he was just a Freshman. Because there were rumors that he hid a switchblade in his pocket, that he smoked after school, that he picked fights with older kids and won them all.

Only the last one wasn't true, and it drove Roy nuts. He wasn't worried. Well...

He tried to convince himself he wasn't worried. But more often than not it ended in Jason rapping on his window at four in the morning with blood streaming down his face from an unidentifiable source, asking for help patching himself up, or setting his broken nose.

"I can do this myself." Jason insisted, spitting a mouthful of blood into the sink. "Really."

"Then why come to me?"

He shrugged, looking away.

"Seriously," Roy sighed, dabbing the alcohol wipe above his eye. "If you're such a tough guy, if you can handle it yourself-"

"Just to annoy you." He decided with a grin, teeth full of blood, eyes glinting in that wild way that made his heart stir.

"...you're such an ass."

"Pretty much." Jason winced at the touch of the alcohol to a particular spot. "Can I stay the night? Bruce'll freak the fuck out if he sees me like this, all beat up."

"Fine, whatever." Roy pretended it drove him crazy, but...

The only thing bothering him was the tight feeling in his throat as Jason laid beside him in bed. It didn't really go away ever, but that didn't mean it didn't get worse sometimes. 

"Hey, Jay?" 

"Hrrmp?" He mumbled, clearing his throat. "Yeah?"

"Weird question: do you have like, a favorite flower?"

"Mm..." Jason yawned. "Probably dandelions, or some shit like that. 'Cause they grow like, fuckin'... Everywhere. Not too cliche, or overdone."

Dandelions. With little, dainty yellow petals like the ones he was coughing out of his lungs.

"Yeah, makes sense." He finally managed out.

"Why?"

"No reason." Roy shrugged. "Get some rest, Jay."

"Kay. Night, Roy."

"Night, man."

He didn't get any sleep that night. He was too busy thinking about dandelions and symbolism and how there was no denying it before, but now he really, really knew. 

Because pretty yellow petals were caught between his teeth while watching Jason sleep, trying to cough quietly so he wouldn't wake him.

***

"Hey, Roy? Quick question."

The two of them were waiting for Jason to get done 'getting ready,' or in reality, get done probably having a smoke break. Sitting at the bottom of the stairs by the door in the Wayne house, they scrolled aimlessly on their phones, and now Roy thought too hard about whose house it was. Well, Dick's house? That's what he knew it as first. Jason's house?

Never mind. It didn't really matter.

"Yeah? What is it?" He grinned. "Got something in my teeth?"

The three of them were meeting up with the others: Donna, Garth, and Wally, to go to the mall together. Just hanging out. Celebrating finally being done with finals. As of now, he was officially a Junior in high school. 

"No, it's... More serious than that." Dick glanced up the stairs, at Jason's room's door. "Do you... Okay, this'll be awkward."

Roy swallowed. "Shoot."

"Do you happen to have a crush on Jason?"

He froze dead in his seat. Deer in the headlights, eyes wide, lungs panicking for breath-

-Coughing, choking, no air getting to his lungs-

-Roy doubled over, holding his hand over his mouth, flutters of petals escaping his lips. Dick rubbed circles into his back. Vaguely, he could hear him saying something.

"-okay? Get to a trash can if you think you're going to puke; or tell me and I'll bring you one. That sounds nasty, dude. You haven't taken up smoking too, have you?"

Weakly, he shook his head. "Nah, just... A little sick, you know? And not going to puke."

Careful to keep them concealed, Roy pressed the dandelion petals into his fist, then shoved his hand into his pocket.

"No kidding." Dick laughed, running a hand through his hair. "Bet you caught it from Jason. He's sounded awful lately."

Unlikely.

"Eh, it's probably just coming around." Roy shrugged. "What's taking him so long? I'm going up there to startle him."

"You know... You never answered my question." He pointed out. "Well... You like him. I already know that. I just want to hear you say it."

He couldn't. This was one of his best friend's foster brothers, for fuck's sales. How could he admit to him outright that he had a crush on him. It was disrespectful. It was-

True. And he already knew about it. Because it was Dick. And he knew about everything.

"I... Yeah. I really do like him."

"Weird as hell." Dick sighed, shaking his head, then shrugging. "But hey, I guess, man. Whatever boats your float? And yeah, he's taking too long. Let's go."

And yeah, maybe startling a guy who had a reputation for carrying a knife wasn't a good idea, but the shriek he made when they threw open the door? Made it worth it.

Dick didn't bother him about the crush again. He may have noticed that, but he didn't notice the petals.

***

"Hey... Roy?"

It was in the summertime, the middle of the night, and both of them were looking for something new to do... But mostly that lead to the same old things. Jason getting in fights that were a little too much for him to come out unscathed and Roy patching him back up again. Sneaking into R rated movies. Walking around town to see the lights, and how different everything looked from the daytime.

Or, like right now, just lying lazily on their backs on the roof, staring upward at the stars. Jason was finishing up having a smoke. Roy was having a hard time choosing between looking at him or the sky.

It was hard, when he was so beautiful. Those features had defined so much since they were awkward, soft-faced kids. His nose was strong, crooked from all the times it has been broken but in a way that gave it character? Not in a way that made it look like a blob. Aquamarine didn't sound so pretentious anymore when it was talking about those eyes, hiding under full, dark brows and behind thick lashes, eyelids resting just half closed. Those lips, that subtle Cupid's bow, his jawline like carved marble-

"Roy." Jason repeated, a smirk twitching at those perfect lips. "Are you falling asleep on me, dumbass?"

No, Roy wanted to say; I'm just spacing out looking at you, because you're the most beautiful man I've seen in my life. "Yeah, probably."

"Mm." He hummed, eyes resting shut for a moment. "I was wondering about something, and... You asked it a stupid fuckin' long time ago."

"Well, what is it?"

"Do you have a favorite flower?"

Did he? Was there any particular flower that resonated with him? He couldn't really think of any...

"I guess... If I had to say any, probably poppies?" Roy shrugged. "Just because of the whole, put you to sleep thing."

Jason stiffened beside him, going silent for a moment. Two. "...you know they don't actually do that, right? That's just from the fucking Wizard of Oz?"

"Well, yeah..." 

"And that's just 'cause like, opium is from poppies." He explained, letting his eyes fall shut again. "You know, the drug?"

"I know what opium is, I'm not an idiot." Roy rolled his eyes. "I swear you think I'm so dumb sometimes."

Jason chuckled, leaning in close to his face. "It's 'cause you act so dumb sometimes."

He could feel his face heating up, but still he moved closer. "Is it now?"

"Of course it-"

Cough interrupting his word, Jason pulled away from his face. He sounded terrible, hacking and wheezing...

"Jeez, man." Roy reached over, rubbing his shoulder. "You've gotta stop smoking."

He shook his head. "Just sick. Probably from you."

Probably not, Roy thought to himself.

Probably not.

Because there was no way Jason loved him back. Not when he was so beautiful, so incredible, so otherworldly under the stars.

***

In the middle of Junior year, Roy coughed up his first full flower, vision blurring and starting to go black. Spatters of blood stained his hand, coughed up from his lungs, torn up from the pressure of the flowers growing inside, taking over his body-

And no one knew about it. No one could know about it. Because Jason...

This year, he finally broke out of his shell. He decided to do theater, and he was thriving in that environment, even if he didn't really 'make friends,' per se. Despite the face that he seemed to be smoking more, he was caring less. Smiling. Laughing. Studding and putting patches on a denim vest himself and wearing it all the time, except when he put it on Roy.

And that... That made his heart flutter and stir and go all sorts of places. Because it was one thing to wear his clothes sometimes, and another to be trusted with things he really cared about.

But this wasn't about himself. It was about Jason.

Because Jason was doing well. He couldn't tell him and ruin that.

And he couldn't burden his friends with it either; that would just be mean. Uncalled for. They had other things to worry about. And besides, they would pressure him to tell Jason, and...

Yeah. 

The only other person really in his life was... Ollie. And fat chance was he telling him.

So it stayed a secret. And that was fine with him.

Even as things got worse. Because that was all they would do, until it was too late.

***

When Jason Todd had moved in, Roy wasn't prepared for what would follow. And at this point... 

He had to do something. There was no more time left. 

Every day there were more and more flowers coming out of his mouth, dandelions spilling up from the cracks in his lungs. They were a resilient flower. Resourceful. They found a way to survive and grow anywhere, despite the circumstance, just like Jason, except their circumstance was inside his lungs and they sure were thriving, taking over him.

And at this point... Would it be so bad to just lie down and sleep? To stop breathing? To let the flowers use him as food and become the dirt?

The answer was yes. He didn't actually was to die; it was just what came to mind. Thoughts like that always raced through his head, wanting to surface, and right now...

The only options he had were to confess and get a positive response...

Get a surgery that would make him lose all of the memories the two of them had together...

Or death.

And it was impossible not to consider all of the options, right? So, needless to say he wasn't prepared. How do you prepare for a thing like that? How can you be ready? He had plenty of time but not enough.

A lifetime with Jason wouldn't be enough.

And how can you be ready to confess that you love someone?

Roy had no idea. He just knew that he texted Jason to meet him on the sidewalk after he finished his homework, and he said he'd be out in five. So of course he rushed out there immediately to wait, as if Jason would get done and out early, even though their houses were literally across from each other and he could see his from inside, and if he finished early he would be able to see him leaving his house-

But it didn't matter. The spring air was warm and inviting, anyway. Even though, with how bad his oxygen supply had been, he had felt kind of cold lately. Fingers and toes just didn't warm up like they used to. At least, he figured that's what that was.

But it was okay. It was nice out, despite everything.

How the hell was he going to do this?

"Oh, hey." Jason shut his front door behind him, walking out and plopping down on the sidewalk. "So..."

Roy raised an eyebrow. "So..."

"Amy reason in particular we're on the sidewalk?"

"Oh. Right to the point." He blinked, glancing around at everywhere that wasn't Jason's piercing eyes. "Yeah..."

"Or not, but now I'm curious. What's going on? Sidewalk talks are always serious."

"Are they? Well, fuck..." Roy could feel his face heating up. "I, uhh..."

"Come on, spit it out!" Jason grinned, elbowing him lightly. "What, do you have a crush on Dick or something? That'd be gross. I mean, fine, but-"

"What?" He choked, beginning to cough. "No!"

"I mean, you're always over at the fucking house. It'd make sense."

"I don't-"

Jason shrugged. "I wouldn't judge if you-"

And that was all it took. The coughing, wheezing, retching - flowers spilling from his mouth into his ready hands, blood dripping from his lips. Dandelions. Bright yellow and dark red, held in his shaking hands.

His vision blurred for a second, then it all came back into focus.

"Do you have-" Jason froze. "You're serious? That's real?"

Roy swallowed, his throat raw and hoarse. "Yeah, I... I mean, why would I fake this?"

"It would be a pretty cruel prank, I'll tell you that much."

"Pfft, yeah." He choked out. "But I... They're dandelions, Jason."

Jason frowned. "...and?"

"It's," Roy squeezed his eyes shut. "It's you. You're the one I'm in love with."

He couldn't move, couldn't open his eyes. The silence was too much, the sound of Jason moving but not saying a word, and Roy was beginning to panic, but not really. He was just thinking about those options again.

And these memories? They were some of the best of his life.

But when he opened his eyes... 

Jason was gone.

And it wasn't a surprise, because he knew he'd never love him in the first place.

But still. It hurt.

***

Against all odds, after nearly three years, Jason ran away. And it was his fault.

It was just like everyone said he would. Don't get attached. Don't fall for him. But what did Roy do?

He sighed, the sound coming out like a sad hiss. 

And now he was paying for it.

***

Days went by. Nothing. Nothing but pain with every breath.

***

Roy woke up to a tapping on his window.

It had to just be a tree branch or something, he thought to himself, rolling over again. It had been a full week since Jason left, and no one had seen any trace of him. Gone. Disappeared. Up and left. He had gathered his things from his house and gone off to who knows where. There was no way that it was actually a person there, and he was just torturing himself with the idea that it could be him.

It couldn't be him.

But it could be him.

It could be Jason, having gotten into a fight, tapping on the window so that he would let him in and fix him up, always offering token resistance, but nothing more than that. Walking away in the morning with bandaids plastered to his face and knuckles, a grin on that perfect mouth. 

It could be Jason, here to apologize for running off without saying a word while his eyes were still shut. For not even saying goodbye.

It could be Jason, here to tell him that he was actually an alien, and he had to visit his home planet-

The tapping got louder, and more persistent. No, someone had definitely climbed up onto the balcony. And who would do that except...

Maybe Dick. Yeah, maybe Dick.

Roy steeled himself, pushing back the covers and climbing out of bed to go get he window, fully prepared for Dick to be standing on the other side. Pushing back the curtains, though...

There was Jason, like a dream. Tall and lanky as ever, uninjured save for a trickle of blood running down his chin.

For a second he just stood there in disbelief. He couldn't move. Couldn't breathe. Couldn't think to open the sliding glass door. But when he did...

Jason gasped a breath. "I'm sorry."

"What?"

"I-" He sucked in, a horrible rattling noise coming from his throat. "I just panicked. It wasn't very... Fuck. How do I say this?"

Roy tipped his head, squinting, trying to piece back together the week of missing time, the apology, exactly what he meant- "Say what?"

Holding out his hands, Jason revealed piles of thin, delicate petals, spotted with dots of blood. The petals themselves were a orangey red, the flowers not too small but not very big, just-

"Poppies." He realized, in a dawning revelation.

"I stayed because you cared about me whether I ran or not, and I fell in love with the way you approach life. You love everything so much, Roy Harper, and it's exhausting. I understand why you just want to go the fuck to sleep because you spend all of your energy on everyone else. You're so beautiful, and funny, and annoying as shit-" Jason laughed, eyes falling to the floor. "But you're..."

Trailing off, his voice broke.

"Yeah." Roy agreed, unable to say anything else.

He met his eyes. "Yeah."

"Now come here, and let me hug you." Coming forward, he crushing Jason in a tight hug. "You scared me, you know that?"

"Yeah, yeah..."

"And you're bleeding, idiot." Roy pointed out.

Jason scoffed. "That's from my throat.

But their throats were clear now. Flowers gone. He really did feel the same way about him. He came back, and-

He had a feeling Jason wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. But he could be. Roy didn't know. Only one thing was for sure: he wasn't prepared for this shit.

Even if it turned out better than he could've imagined.


	3. Injury

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roy gets badly injured while out on patrol, and some truth comes out along the way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a lot of blood and injury, and some drug references!

Jason was no stranger to injury. He'd died, for fuck's sake; he knew what it was like to get hurt. Somewhere between growing up on the streets, being with Bats, and working as a vigilante for so long, it all just became... Sort of normal? In a sick kind of way, at least. 

All of that to say that blood was no stranger to him. He was used to it. Blood, guts, the whole works. He knew when someone was hurt bad and when they were just being a baby. He knew when to start to panic.

And now was when it was time to panic.

Because all that experience just made him know that this was a lot of blood. Too much. It was bad, bad, and if they didn't get help soon-

"Hey, Roy, it's gonna be fine." Jason tried his best to sound reassuring, but he knew his voice was wavering. Panicking, breaking down. "Just hold on a little longer, okay? Help is coming."

"Y-yeah." Roy nodded, swallowing, his eyes focusing hard, meeting his own. "Take off your..."

His helmet, right. He had forgotten that it was still on, in the midst of the fray. Keeping pressure on the torn stab wound with one hand, he pushed the helmet off with the other, letting it fall off and clatter to the ground behind him. Didn't matter. What mattered right now was keeping steady eye contact with his partner to try to keep him from passing out, and keeping steadier pressure on the wound.

"Hey, Jay?" Roy's voice broke. "Know what's funny?"

He sighed, breath shaking. "What is it?"

"You're the one who broke secret identities. Said my name."

Jason shook his head. "You're such an idiot, you know that?"

He laughed. "Your idiot."

Leaping up into his throat, his heart couldn't seem to decide between beating twice as fast or stopping entirely. It wasn't fair; he couldn't seem to figure it all out...

Roy was his business partner. That's what he was to him. He had been Dick's best friend, which was awkward, but not that weird. He was his friend. A companion. Something more...

Someone he had feelings for. Someone who made his heart leap in his chest every time he laughed, every time he smiled, every time he said something dumb and flirty as a joke.

"I think you've lost too much blood." Jason shot back. "You're seeing things. Think I'm someone else."

"Nah, I know it's you, Jay." Roy smiled, head lolling back loosely, too relaxed, in a kind of way he only got when he was hurt bad. "I know it's you with your gruff voice and your day old stubble and your pretty blue eyes and that dumb white streak in your hair..."

He reached up with bloody fingers, touching that white streak of hair. Probably marking a few locks of it red. That would be a bitch to clean later, but he couldn't find the heart to yell at him for it; not when his fingers were so gentle, so soft. Not while he was bleeding so much all over the place.

"You laugh and call me pretty boy when I shave my body sometimes, but you? You're the pretty one."

Jason turned his head away. "Now I really know you've lost too much blood."

"No. No, Jay, look at me." He demanded, fingers coming back up to his face. "I'm really bleeding bad, right."

"Well... Yeah."

"And help is coming?"

"Yeah, help's on the way." 

"But right now, I'm feeling desperate and scared." Roy admitted. "And like nothing matters anyway, if I tell you."

He blinked. "What do you..."

"So I love you. I love every bit of you."

Jason felt frozen in place. Every part of him was cold but his hands, still pressed to the hot, bloody wound in Roy's chest. He had to think, to comprehend what he just said, to put the pieces together, but... 

Instead he just sat there, dumbfounded. 

"You can't die on me." He finally whispered after a long time of cold, harsh silence. "You can't admit you love me and then die, it's too fucking cliche."

"I would die in a cliche, wouldn't I?" Roy smiled, eyes looking blurry and glossed over as he blinked once, twice. "Seems like me. Pretty fitting. Never had much luck with love anyways-"

"You're such a dumbass." Jason shook his head, tears starting to form in his eyes. "When you make it out of this, you owe me a drink for all of this bullshit you're doing right now."

"Only if it's a date?" He winked. "Nah, I'm kidding. I know that you're not into me, so-"

"Wait. What the hell made you think I'm not into you!?"

"...you?"

"I-"

"Jason, I'm starting to get dizzy." Roy declared, hands coming up to hold Jason's wrists. "Might black out, don't know."

"Alright, just keep focusing on staying awake." Jason swallowed, trying to keep steady; it was still too much blood, where was their backup? "Help is coming, don't sweat it. Everything's going to be alright."

"'Course it is. You're here."

"Don't be cheesy." He rolled his eyes. "Keep talking to me. What's your...?"

"Ideal date? Glad you asked." Roy chuckled, voice starting to get fainter, more mumbling mixed in with his words. "I'd take you to the beach, with a picnic dinner. And we'd walk along the beach in the sand and collect shells, then come back to a grassy spot for a picnic watching the sunset. With a glass of sparkling cider, 'cause I don't drink that often."

"Man, you've put thought into that."

"What can I say, hopeless romantic." His grip on Jason's wrists was loosening. "Hopeless romantic, always alone..."

"But I'm with you, Roy. It's okay." Jason assured him, leaning forward, keeping pressure. "It's okay."

Where was help when you needed them?"

"I know. It's okay. Not alone." Roy whispered ever so quietly just before he passed out from the blood loss.

But it wasn't okay. It wasn't okay because Jason was left there, holding him, keeping pressure on the wound until help arrived, wondering if his partner would be alright. He was stuck there thinking about that love confession, about that ideal date, and how the man who shared that with him could very well be dying here right now.

And all he could do was keep pressure on the wound.

It was maddening. Sickening, how much blood there was, and he wasn't squeamish. Couldn't be, in this kind of work, with his background. But thinking of that all coming from Roy? Still made him sick.

But Jason held out until help came. Then he rode in the back of a sad approximation of an ambulance, watching the medics do their work.

***

It was hours before Roy woke up. Jason lost count at some point; he didn't care how long it had been at long as his partner - his friend - was alive and well. That was all that mattered to him, at this point.

So he paced the halls of the makeshift hospital, wishing that he could do more, that they could be somewhere better, more legal. That their line of work didn't make real hospitals... Dangerous. 

But that was how it was. No use complaining about it.

And Roy was awake now. Jason stood outside the door, stoking himself up. Deep breaths. It would be fine. Just like normal when he got a serious injury. Just some teasing, then a more serious warning not to be so reckless, then leaving after getting the medics information about how to treat the wound. 

But it was different. That wasn't normally his Roy acted when he got hurt. There was something more urgent, there. Something more... Real.

Holding his breath, Jason pushed open the door. 

And there was Roy, looking like...

"Jeez, you look like shit." Jason scoffed, running a hand through his hair.

It was true. His red hair looked limp and dull in the overhead lighting, his skin lifeless and pale. Something about it emphasized the deep lines under his eyes, making him look tired and, well... Dead. Lying there in that hospital bed, with bandages no doubt wrapped around his chest, tubes hooked up to his arms, only wearing a hospital gown and a sheet...

He looked dead. If it weren't for the mischievous glint in those green eyes, that is. That characteristic smirk pulling up at his lips, making it all okay.

It was all okay.

"Really? I almost die and that's the first thing you have to say to me?" Roy rolled his eyes. "You are such an asshole."

"You love it."

It's something that they would have said so casually before, but now that they knew, now that there was more meaning to it...

Both of their gazes dropped to the floor. Jason could feel his face heating up, and was sure Roy's was doing the same.

"So..." Roy started. "I owe you a drink?"

"Well, yeah." Jason added on, awkwardly. "But it's, uh..."

"But it's a date." He finished. "If you're still up for that?"

"Of course I'm still up for that; why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know?" Roy shrugged, a bunch of tubes shrugging with him. "You just seemed really... Well... You know."

"This whole thing is just weird." He pointed out. "That's all."

"True, true..." Roy nodded. "Oh, wait. I can't leave this bed, can I?" 

"Not yet you can't, dumbass." Jason rolled his eyes. "You're still hooked up to an IV, and all sorts of other shit."

"How long 'til we're out of here?"

"To be honest? No clue." He shrugged. "But you're not going to be on the field for a whole. That knife really did a number on you."

"Yeah... Knives'll do that." Roy declared, nodding thoughtfully. "So, step one is to get out of here, step two is drinks?"

"Roy, it's eight thirty in the morning." Jason pointed out. "And as much as I love day drinking-"

"Bad plan." He rolled his eyes. "No, I'm kidding. I know that it's not a good plan; they just have me on some wild painkillers here... That wouldn't mix well with alcohol. I'm kinda fucked up."

"I don't think fucked up is the wording you use for prescription-"

"Oh yeah, it totally is." Roy corrected. "I mean-"

"Not if you're getting it from a doctor."

"Yeah, yeah, I know." He grinned. "And besides, I don't do drugs, anymore. That's pretty much not me."

Jason nodded. "So, first step is to get out of here. Second step is to get to a safe house so you can crash and get sober again-"

"I mean, I might be taking this shit for a while." Roy reminded him. "Chest stab wounds don't heal overnight."

"True..." He nodded, taking a breath and letting it out slowly... Then breaking out into a grin. "Until then, I guess you're just going to have to stay in the safe house while I go out."

"Oh, that's fucking torture."  
"Well, you can't go out like that, can you?" Jason pointed out. "I'll make sure you don't starve, don't worry."

"Oh, thank you so much." Roy smiled, rolling his eyes. "Whatever shall I do without you?"

"Die alone?"  
He choked. "True. I mean... Yeah, but true."

"Nah, you'd figure some shit out." Jason shrugged. "Third step is to go out for drinks, since you owe me, and yeah, sure it can be a date. And maybe, somewhere along the line, if you're lucky, we can drive up somewhere with nicer beaches with a picnic lunch, and walk along the sand, collecting seashells before watching the sunset while we eat."

Roy grinned. "You were listening that close?"  
Every word, he wanted to say. I was dead focused on every single word you said. Instead, he just shrugged again.

"Damn... That's some dedication." He blinked slowly, leaning back into the hospital bed. "I'm getting tired again, so I probably have to sleep, but... Sounds like a plan?"  
Jason nodded. "Sure... And Roy?"  
"Yeah?"

"Don't you ever get that fucking close to dying again. You got that, you fucking idiot?"

Roy just smiled that signature lopsided grin, with those intense green eyes staring right back into his soul. "'Course not. I promise."

Just like he promised last time... And just like Jason promised last time, too. 

They were no stranger to injuries. And they would keep getting them, no doubt. And as Roy drifted off to sleep, Jason figured that they would just have to be there for each other. 

'Cause that's what they did.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on tumblr at Supertinywords or Supertinybats!
> 
> Requests are closed at the moment!
> 
> Comments are love <3


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